Interview: Hi. My name is Officer Dante Servin and I murdered Rekia Boyd.

Disclaimer: This is socio-political satire.
First, let me just tell you that I am a proud white cop, and I did shoot and kill Rekia Boyd who just happens to be black. However, I don’t believe that I did anything wrong. I would have preferred that she did not die, but as I told that one French documentary team, my soul is clear.  Also, many people have claimed that this was race related and that is simply NOT true. In fact, I even live around many of the blacks. And my choice of address had NOTHING to do with the fact that I work right around the corner at the local police department and needed to reduce my commute. But I digress…  I have several reasons to believe that I am free of guilt. Here are some of them:
  1. I warned ALL OF THEM.

The day before I killed the girl, I asked a crowd of people in the neighborhood, “What do I have to do around here to get some peace, quiet and respect? Shoot someone?" You see? I gave them an opportunity to lower their music. I gave them 24 hours to realize that loud music won’t be tolerated. They didn’t listen.

  1. I am the LAW.

 I work for the illustrious Chicago Police Department. Even though you might have seen us in the news lately when one of my brothers in arms (Steve Mandell) was arrested for extorting local businessmen in a homemade torture chamber  I assure you that we are the good guys. In fact, I am only the 2nd Chicago cop to be indicted for a shooting since 1997. You may be thinking, “That’s just because the system doesn’t work,” but I assure you, it’s because we behave ourselves 98% of the time. That being said, we expect deference. That’s why when I drove up on a crowd of people at 1 AM whilst I was off duty, I expected to be obeyed when I demanded that they turn the music down. They didn’t. Luckily for me 2 circumstances lined up: 1) I already had my gun in my lap and 2) some black guy pulled a cell phone out. I shot at the guy, but unfortunately he was only wounded luckily he survived. Unluckily, Rekia, an innocent bystander, was killed. I swear to you that when I peeled off shooting my gun over my shoulder blindly, I was trying to hit the black guy, NOT Rekia.

  1. I was scared.

Truthfully, I was scared. You may be tempted to challenge this claim, but I was. You see, even though I have been trained by the city to responsibly handle high-danger and high-stress combat situations, I get really nervous around black guys, especially when they wear hoodies and baggy pants. It took such personal courage for me to decide to live in the Douglas Park area. You see, one of my vices is trap-music/gangster-rap/drill-music/crack-music. I have been listening to it for years now. In this "genre", I have listened to countless rappers declare that black manhood is linked to violence. So when I see black guys who look like the rappers, I instantly become anxious and apprehensive. This isn’t racism. Is it? I mean it's you black people who are informing me of what you all are capable of. I'm no expert on black people so I have to trust those who are. 

In conclusion, I really hope you all understand that I am the real victim here. Just like my buddy and Fraternal Order of Police spokesman Pat Camden said, “It's a sad day when an officer is charged for doing something he was trained to do.” That being said, I am just going to be frank with you. I don’t view poor black people as full human beings which is why myself and my brothers in blue don’t treat you all with the humanity that us white people deserve. Which is why when we serve low risk warrants to many non-violent offenders, we knock doors down and tear up the house as is deserved. But we calmly enter white people’s houses and politely request cooperation because that is what civilized people deserve.

I hope you people reading this have a better understanding of what happened and I encourage you to change YOURSELF and you might get better treatment from the law. Even Louisiana Governor Bobby Jindal said that and he’s a brown person

Antonio Cross pictured on the left, was shot in the hand by Chicago Police Officer Dante Servin. He lived. The young lady pictured on the right was shot during the same altercation by Servin. She died. Her name is Rekia Boyd may her soul forever find peace.

DISCLAIMER: This interview did not take place. THIS IS SOCIO-POLITICAL SATIRE. Dante Servin did not provide any of the aforementioned copy. However, police brutality is STILL a very real problem for poor Latino and African Americans and it is a phenomenon that does not receive enough media attention. For every case that achieves notoriety, there are 10 that are swept under the rug. The time for action is long overdue…

Leave a comment

Please note, comments must be approved before they are published